1925: The Ballad of Boyd McGee

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"Ahh... It's a great day to deliver the mail," said the mailman Boyd McGee as he went to his car to deliver the mail. "Too bad my uniform has a big coffee stain on it. I hope nobody notices."

After a long day of delivering the mail, he came to the last house on his route, which also happened to be on his own street. There was just one piece of mail for his neighbor Clara Kohlmeier: a pink letter with hearts on it. Once that was done he went home.

"Ahh... It's a great day to get my mail," said Clara Kohlmeier, a lonely widow, as she went outside to get the mail. When she looked outside she saw her neighbor Boyd McGee put a pink card into her mailbox and walk away. She went to the mail box and read the letter. "It's a love letter!!" she yelled, and ran inside.

The Next Day

"Hey, this goes to me," said Boyd the mailman as he dropped off a big box at his house that was addressed to him. "Well, better bring it inside." He opened the door and put the box on the floor. "Hmm... What is this?" he asked himself. He got some scissors from the kitchen and cut it open.

"I love you!!!!" yelled Clara as she jumped out of the box in a pink dress, and thrust a plate of heart shaped cookies into his hands.

"What? Who? Why are you in a box with hearts... and are you in love with ME?!" he yelled.

"What, you don't love me too?" she asked. "No, I don't," he stammered, shuffling his feet.

"Then why did you give me a love note in the mail?"

"I deliver the mail, not write it."

"Oh..." She took her plate of cookies and walked to the door dejectedly.

"Wait, the letter was from me. I just wanted to hide it. I love you too!" yelled Boyd.

-- Ronny VanderVeen


Evidence


While there was a mailman named Boyd McGee who lived at 4425 S. Dawson in the 1950s and a “janitress” named Clara Kohlmeier who lived at 4427 S. Dawson in the 1930s, other than that this cinematic love story is pure fiction.
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